I hate the word “broken” when it’s used in relation to trauma and mental health.

What a damaging and unproductive way to think about oneself. I used to see the word thrown about carelessly, but I notice lately people are more careful with it. I would love to see it banned from the mental health and wellness space altogether. If we think of ourselves as broken, we think of ourselves as something to be fixed. This implies that we need improving or that we are not good enough as we are, with everything that’s happened that brought us to this current place.

Let me be clear – there is nothing wrong with you. You are NOT broken, unworthy, or unlovable. You are exactly who you are supposed to be. Everything that has happened in your life made you who you are today, and that person is perfect. You are beautiful, strong, capable, and determined. If you weren’t, you never would have made it this far.

So banish the word “broken” from your life, along with “should”, “must”, “have to”, “need to” – all that bullshit that keeps you feeling small and stuck. And it really is bullshit. Everyone has problems, trauma, shadow selves – does that mean everyone is broken? If everyone is broken … then is brokenness a thing? I think not. It’s simply a sign of your humanity.

Calling yourself broken does nothing to serve or uplift you. It brings you down, makes you feel small and insecure, like you are not as good as everyone else. That’s no way to live. It’s counterproductive to your healing. Yes, you have trauma, and yes, you have healing to work on. You aren’t perfect. No one is. But you sure as hell aren’t broken either.

You are healing, growing, evolving, and transforming. Doesn’t that feel better than thinking of yourself as damaged?

What if you can eliminate the concept of being broken from your world? How can that help you shift your mentality and self-worth?

Be kind to yourself. Start by refusing to think of yourself as broken.

You matter, and the words you say to yourself – out loud or silently – matter. Start speaking to yourself more kindly. Notice when words like “broken” and “damaged” creep into your thoughts about your own position in life. Start to replace them with something more positive. You can shift the way you speak to yourself, and thus think about yourself. I believe in you and I love you.