So easy to say, so hard to do.
How much simpler would our lives be if we felt less attached to everything that moves through them? People, pets, houses, cars, things … all this stuff that we cling to because we forget who we are, that we have everything that we need within ourselves, that we don’t take any of it with us at the end. Even if we know that in theory, most of us clench on to the relationships and possessions in our lives as if we don’t even exist without them.
Of course it hurts when you lose someone you love, or a beloved animal passes away. Life is never going to be without loss, pain, and grief. We think that our attachment will save us from drowning in our sorrow, but the reality is that we cannot escape the difficult aspects of our existence on this earth. Clinging on to everything keeps us stuck in the past so that we cannot enjoy our present, and that actually creates more sadness and discord in our lives than if we could learn to release what is no longer for us.
I think that part of the problem is that we qualify our worth by everything outside of ourselves. If we lose a partner, we think that means something negative about us. If we don’t have certain possessions or a particular career status by some random age, we think that means something negative about us. If our loved ones pass away, we believe that we will never fill the holes that they left behind, that we will be alone, that our lives will hold less value without them.
Yes, we must definitely hold space for our emotions. We must grieve our losses and honor our feelings. How often do we really do this, though? How often do we instead cut our process short, stuffing all that energy deep inside to stew and simmer and poison us with its toxicity? I believe that we are unconsciously afraid to let it pass through us, afraid that if we honor ourselves and release that which is gone, we are somehow dishonoring it.
There is no shame in living a fulfilled life. Do you really believe that the people who loved you who have exited this earthly realm want you to wallow in your grief and let the days pass you by without enjoyment? Of course not. And you are not less than because you lost a romantic relationship, or even a friendship. It simply means that something which was once in resonance is no longer. That is no reflection on you, or them. People change. Life changes. The more easily we accept this and move into flow, the better everything becomes along the way.
In order to get into an energy flow that’s aligned, we have to learn to release and move along. We can’t be in flow if we are clinging to old shit and stuck in stagnant energy. It’s impossible. If you’re feeling trapped, stuck, scared, helpless, it’s likely that you are holding on to that which needs to be set free. I know it’s scary, but that’s only because you aren’t used to it. Like anything else, with practice, it becomes easy – even joyous, if you let it.
So what if you embrace the flow and release that which is slipping away from you anyway? You stop nothing by attaching – you only keep yourself in a state of unhappiness. The results are inevitably the same. You have the power to uplift yourself and keep your life moving in a positive direction.
I believe that you can learn to breathe into the present and release what keeps you trapped in the past. You are powerful, and capable, and brave. You’re doing the best you can with what you know – and now you know more, and you can continue to grow and change. Sending you so much love. You’ve got this.