I spent most of my life up in my head, making things harder for myself. Overthinking is real, and it’s a real problem. When we are wrapped up in our thoughts, especially when we haven’t dealt with our trauma, we become paralyzed. We are unable to stay present and truly enjoy our lives.
We think we’re enjoying ourselves – numbing with food, drugs, alcohol, sex, shitty TV, whatever. We have a million coping mechanisms to distract us from the truth. The truth that we will never actually feel better until we face what’s going on and work on our mental, emotional and spiritual health. There are no shortcuts. There are no quick fixes. Trust me, I know. I stayed stuck for years, and the bright spots always faded as quickly as they began. I could not create lasting joy and peace because I had no solid foundation.
Most of us rely on outside sources for our happiness. This places us in a terrible situation. It means that external forces determine our quality of life. If one bad situation, one breakup, one job loss, one death can completely ruin everything… well, we end up living in constant fear. We clutch to everything and everyone around us. We are not in control of our own lives. Not only that, but we have simply handed over that control of our own free will. And we usually don’t even understand that.
I’m learning so much on my own journey. I am finally allowing myself to blossom – by accepting and loving myself as I am. The more I accept myself, the better able I am to BE myself. The more I accept myself, the better able I am to accept that not everyone will like me. I now know that’s okay. Staying true to who I am overrules everything else. No more people pleasing. No more perfectionism. No more rampant self-judgment, or deciding for others whether I’m worthy of their time and attention. I exist in my skin, as I am, accepting myself. If they stay, they’re my people. If they don’t, they were never meant to be there.
Of course, I strive to be the best version of myself. I strive to stay present, mindful, kind, compassionate, and open. Accepting yourself doesn’t mean giving yourself a free pass to be a dick. It means being your own best friend, biggest support, and most compassionate audience. You are human. You will mess up. What matters is how you treat yourself, and others, when you do.
Now that I’m allowing my true self to shine through, I feel I’m finally blossoming. Better now than never! I am grateful each and every day that this is my journey. It could’ve been so very different. I am proud of myself and my refusal to settle for lifelong unhappiness. Something deep within me knew there was more. Somewhere inside I knew there had to be a better way, even when my brain told me otherwise.
It doesn’t always have to be a struggle. Sometimes it’s a surrender. Sometimes it’s a softening. Ironically, that terrifies most of us more than fighting for our lives. But you deserve softness, and flow, and ease. It is possible. Allow the blossoming of your true self.
Sending you all the love.